One of the first books I ever read as a teenager, when I thought "subtle" was pronounced "sub-tle," was The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. It used to be my favorite book until I had arguments with people that made me realize how horrible the book might actually be and that the first step of not giving a fuck is probably not reading a book that tells you how to not give a fuck. However, I still think everyone needs to read this book. Some arguments claim that Mark Manson's style of writing belongs in blogs rather than books, which is why many people consider it horrible. For me, however, that is exactly what made me finish the book, because it felt friendly, conversational, and light.
This book did not teach me anything entirely new; it simply reinforced ideas that I already had. His main argument is simple: choose what matters and deliberately accept the struggles that come with those choices. My favorite chapter is Chapter 1, titled "Don't Try." This is mainly because it talks about one of the best writers who motivates me to keep writing even when I feel underwhelmed, none other than Charles Bukowski, whose grave is inscribed with the words "Don't Try." Besides the fact that I love this chapter because he uses Bukowski as an example, Manson raises a very important idea: the obsession with being positive can create a negative cycle. For example: "I should be happy" → "I am not happy" → "Something is wrong with me." He concludes that accepting discomfort, failure, and uncertainty is necessary for living a meaningful life.
There are many interesting chapters, though, such as the chapter where he outlines the importance of saying "NO" and how saying "YES" means saying "NO" to something else. Another is the chapter where he shows how we are always choosing, which he frames best by explaining that you may not be responsible for everything that happens to you, but you are responsible for how you respond. Another chapter that comes close to being my favorite is the one where he shows that you are wrong about everything. This perspective allows for growth because it enables people to change their beliefs without struggling to let go of old ideas. However, this does not mean that one should become impressionable.
One interesting fact about this book is that the author claims that it is not like traditional self-help books, and he is correct in that regard. However, it has created a new kind of cult that may still have its own flaws. He argues that traditional self-help books promote positivity and the idea that we deserve better, yada yada, but his book can also be seen as a danger to society because people may begin to abandon altruism in the name of "NOT GIVING A FUCK." My philosophy dissertation was initially based on this idea, but my lecturers told me that it was not philosophical enough, so I had to change my topic.
